Confused Love

I faulter and my crippled mind explodes
I see you, I quiver, I melt, I die...
I see you, this time my heart implodes
I see you, you don't see me, I sigh.

My silence screams out to you
you don't listen, you smile
and my eyes pierce you through
but still you linger for a while

I breathe in and you breathe out
I see you but you don't know me
my tears quench this drought
and turns into the dead sea.

Your happy eyes make me sick
I want to cut myself and be normal
but my blood is so dark and thick
I can't bleed like others at all!

I see you set free unto the world
like a devastating black plague
I see you, you eat my tortured soul
you see me now, empty and vague

I am nothing without you taunting me
you see me, this empty broken shell
you hear me, my absent-minded plea
you see me now and know me so well.

I always see you and know you somehow
you see me, you hear me, you fear me
I love you, I hate you, I want you now
you smile perfectly but you don't want me.

I see you: perfect smiling happiness
I see you as all the words I can't say
your chaotic perfection makes me die
and I can't wait to die each day...