Birthday Blues

Today is my 34th birthday. I thought I would have fun and that THIS year things would be different but... the truth is I think that things will always be THIS way on my birthday. My aunt is sick. There's a funeral today. My dad... well... my dad ignores me completely and is going to be late for dinner because he was a "thing"... I know I'm not a little kid anymore but I would like to have a friggin'm normal birthday just once in my life! I would like not to be a nervous wreck because of all the family feuding and I would like to gather my whole family for a nice cocktail party of some sort. I would like to be sitting at the table and watching everyone get along and think about how blessed I am. But the truth is far from what I would like. My oncle, my father's twin, married the most horrid woman you can imagine. She's a complete redneck evil person and I absolutely can't tolerate her presence. I wish she would go away. So that's one part of the family I'm not having over. My dad is fighting with my godfather, his older brother, and aren't currently on speaking terms... so that's another part of the family I can't have over. The rest of the family are either away from here (lucky them!) or not speaking to each other. My friends are all far from here too... so I won't have any friends over either. *sigh*
But you know what? I'm not sad... I'm wiggin' out because I'm already 34 years old. Years ago I'd never thought I'd be laying in bed blogging about family feuds on my birthday. LOL. I'm not happy but I'm not sad either. I'm content. I'm alive and I'm living. Can't ask for much more than that. So... happy birthday to me! I hope next year I'll be online writting another bitchy post. :)