Disconnected

Like a bitch in heat I spread my legs to the sun
Unaware that the cold winter had finally come
So I sit patiently and filled with desire
as I disconnect myself and get caught on the wires
I whisper an endless plea for you to return
and to set ablaze this heart that doesn't burn
since the warmth of summer left and winter set.
the leaves have fallen and the ground is wet
by sorrowful tears of the discontent
drowning deeper in love's disappointment
I look up at the sky and see nothing
but clouds filled with pain and sorrow
that rain down on me today, tomorrow
and other times fate may slowly bring.
I stay awake rummaging through memories
trying to figure out what was real
trying to sort out what I should feel
wanting to see what he sees...
I've wasted all wishes and dreams
on a life that isn't my own
I can't live high when I'm feeling low
I hear my thoughts through your screams
and try to pick one to act on
but none of them make any sense
so I keep hanging on the fence
dreaming of what's been said and done.
You said we'd look back and smile
but I look back and only see darkness
that's been brought upon by my own action
And now I live in this merciless limbo
quiet numb faceless sad and empty
trying to be what I should be
and becoming someone I borrowed
from the pages of my favorite book
A lonely girl with sad dark eyes
living in a hopeless world of sighs
clutching an old purple notebook
scribbling this imaginary world
where she is herself and she is free
She sees possibilities others can't see
because she's been gifted with a soul...